This I Believe

I believe in being idealistic. I believe that the way the world is, is not how it is supposed to be. I believe the world can change, and human beings are the ones responsible for creating change. I have been told, more than once, that I hold unattainable standards and the world will never be as good as I desire it to be. Even my Ennegram type tells me the same things. But nevertheless, I believe in holding unattainable standards. I remember clearly a poster that stretched across the chalkboard in my first grade classroom. The poster said, “Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you will land among the stars.” I am sure many first grade classrooms had the same poster, but I have thought about it many times in my life. Today, I believe in shooting past the moon.

I do not believe in being satisfied with “okay” or “a little better” when it comes to people’s lives. I believe one reason we exist on this earth is to share and live in community with other people, a community that has no borders or definitions. And part of being in community is supporting those people in your community.

What does that mean for me, a person of privilege, living in a world of inequality? It means that I have to believe in something better, something ideal, and the ideal is attainable.

This past year I have been exposed to a different world, a different way of life from what has always been my reality. I have seen and befriended people living in extreme forms of poverty. I have met people working for development and dedicating their lives to the pursuit of social justice. I have met people from all walks of life, with different backgrounds and different perspectives. And I often come away from these encounters with one prominent feeling, hope. Hope that things will be better, that things have to change.

But too often I feel overwhelmed by the problems Guatemala faces. Many days it feels like development is a distant dream that will never be recognized. The overwhelming problem is you can work trying to combat one issue, but you encounter so many more that impede your efforts in trying to solve the other. For example, domestic violence is a huge problem throughout Guatemala (and the world). Pastoral de la Mujer (where I have been working) spends a lot of time giving workshops to our women on domestic violence. We teach women about the different forms of violence, and emphasize that violence against anyone is wrong. We encourage women to be supportive of one other, especially those women who are living in violent households. We encourage women to speak out against the violence and teach their children that violence is wrong, even if they see their fathers or uncles or grandfathers abusing their wives or children.

Now this is good and necessary, but is not sufficient. In the majority of situations the women literally have no choice but to stay in their violent situation. A woman might come to our workshop and recognize she is living in a violent situation and want to leave her husband. But the woman has too many other obstacles (all development related) in her way.

1. The woman has no where safe to go. Her family and friends will not accept her back into their house for social reasons, they don’t have economic resources to support her, or both. Also, there are no shelters for women in Guatemala and the police will not protect the woman. It is commonly thought that women are the cause of the problem. If they were a better wife they would not be abused.

2. The woman has no economic means. Since she got married she has been a housewife, and has no money that is “hers.” She cannot support herself or her children and has no competitive skills to find work. Plus, there is simply no work to be found for anyone.

3. She has no education. She went to school when she was very young, but then her parents decided to pull her out so her brothers could study and had to spend her days working with her mother in the house. She is unable to read or write, thus making her even more unemployable. It is impossible for her to go back to school because she has her children and responsibilities to them.

4. She has four children. She can’t leave with her children because she has no way to support them. Men hold all the power and if she was to leave with her children, the police would come and take her children to return to her husband. So, if she wants to keep with her children, she has to stay.

5. She has no legal or government support. Sure there are laws against domestic violence and violence against women in general, but they are not enforced and most people don’t even know they exist.

6. Finally, she feels obligated to her husband and community.

Now this is just one example among many and the point is, you cannot combat one problem without facing many others that need attention too. There is no one problem more pressing than another. So yes, these issues often lead to feeling of despair and hopelessness. But I choose to stay idealistic because there is hope. There is a lot of hope in the small changes that are happening every day. I am the first to admit that we are not changing the majority of the women’s lives, but every now and then there are a few who decide to change the way they live, and change the way their daughters live.

No, the world will not change overnight, but if people, all over the world, choose to truly live in community, the world can and will change. If people of privilege, like myself, choose to live a little more simply, a little more sustainably, we can create change. I do not only believe in small changes. I also believe in government and international action that is working along with the small changes that come from people choosing to live a little more simply so that others can simply live. I believe that God walks with us and accompanies us in this world, and He set pretty idealistic goals for this world. I believe in being idealistic about what our world can and should be.

Mamálita

Mamálita, or Margarita, is another incredible woman I have met here in Guatemala. She is the grandmother of Elvia and about 80 years old now.

Mamálita was born in Santa Teresa, an aldea of San Pedro, San Marcos, the same place Elvia was born. Mamálita's father never worked a day of his life, so it was left to Mamálita's mother and Mamálita, as the oldest child, to take care of the younger children. When Mamálita was 8 years old she left Santa Teresea to go and work in Xela as a domestic servant, but was essentially a slave. She never finished school (I'm not sure if she ever went to school) and cannot read or write.

Well, when Mamálita was 18 she met a man and got pregnant with Elvia's father. This man cheated on Mamálita and never married her. When Hermolindo was born Mamálita sent him to live with her mother in Santa Teresea. Mamálita continued living and working as a servant in Xela and once again got pregnant with Gloria, Elvia's aunt. I am not sure how old Mamálita was when Gloria was born, but she is only 10 years older than Elvia. Mamálita was older at this point, so Gloria always lived with Mamálita in the houses she was working in.

Mamálita was consistently mistreated by her employers, and thought of and treated as trash, not worthy of any respect. She constantly had to be working, because if she was ever caught sitting to rest for a minute, even to eat, she was chastised for being lazy and they would threaten to fire her. And Mamálita claims she often worked for nicer families that treated her better than most families would treat their servants.

Well, eventually Mamálita decided it was time for her to come back to San Marcos and find work in the capital city here (where I am living). Eventually Mamálita was able to find a job cleaning the bishop's house. She worked for the bishop before our current bishop, and worked for the current bishop until this past January. She was finally forced to "retire" because her arthritis has become so bad and has a lot of trouble using stairs. So Mamálita was "retired"in her house for about 4 months and became really depressed because she does not know what it means to not work, and to not work exceptionally hard. So about a month ago Mamálita opened her own comedor up the street from her house (which is across the street from mine). A comedor is like a small restaurant, but they generally only offer one or two plates a day and they are really cheap (Mamálita's meals cost about $1.10 and are delicious) and low key. So now Mamálita has her comedor and seems pretty content to be working again.

The lives of so many people I have met here are so different from myself, and everybody I know in the United States. My favorite thing about being in this country is being able to sit down with people and just listen to their stories, and then after understanding their stories, being able to hear their thoughts on life and the world. Mamálita is a bit more jaded about the world then Beatrice (see other post) but she is still an incredibly strong woman for whom I have a lot of respect.

Doña Beatrice

I am going to tell you the story of an incredible woman named Doña Beatrice. She has lived an incredibly hard life, of which I only know a little. And yet she is still the kindest, most giving, and warm hearted person.

11 years ago my boss here first met Beatrice. She was driving a friend home that lived near the coast and the friend was going to stop in to visit the family of Beatrice. Judy decided to go in and say hi and meet the family as well. What she found was a grandmother trying to keep two twin babies alive. The father had died and Beatrice´s daughter died in childbirth. She had been keeping the babies alive on one tiny can of concentrated milk. Judy said the babies were practically skeletons and Beatrice did not have any money to buy the right type of formula, or even more milk in general. A few weeks before Judy had been sent a donation of $1000 and she had been trying to think of a worthwhile project for the money. Well she decided to to use that money to keep these twin babies alive. So they paid for formula, doctor visits, etc and today the twins are 11 years.

Well, Beatrice has not only had to keep those twin babies alive. She has constantly been supporting her various children, their various children, and their various children. Today she is pretty old (I don´t know how old exactly, I am not sure she really know either) and is still working hard. She cannot read or write, and yet she has tried hard to give her children, and especially her grandchildren, educations. She has one grandchild who has three children, and dropped out of school. Now Beatrice is trying to convince her to go back to school, to finish her education because she knows what it is like to raise countless children without an education.

When her husband died, 55 years ago, all she had was her sewing machine. She says her sewing machine is like her husband, because it has helped support her and provide for her family. This is a pedal sewing machine, but she does not want a new one for various reasons. First, this one has a lot of sentimental value, but also, electricity is hard to come by where she lives. Yes, she has electricity in her house, but most days it does not work. So if she wants to be able to work, she needs her machine without electricity.

I also want to tell you about Doña Beatrice´s daughter-in-law, Oralia. Oralia and her husband (Beatrice´s son) left one day to go to the United States. They had their coyote (the men who lead people to the desert to cross) and made it almost to the border. In the desert Oralia watched another man shoot her husband and decided to go back home to Guatemala. It took her four months to get back home, and during that time their family in Guatemala had no idea if they were alive or not. Well during her trip home Oralia was raped, and got pregnant. Oralia is also uneducated and has never had many job opportunities. One occupation many people have, especially in the coast, is collecting firewood and selling it. Well one day Oralia was out collecting firewood and was raped again, and got pregant again.

I cannot even imagine having so much tragedy in one family, in one life. And yet people are able to continue living. Beatrice understands more than anyone the value of life, the value of living, the value of family, the value of generosity, and the value of love. I think I would have become an incredibly jaded person and without hope for the world. But Doña Beatrice has hope for her family and hope for the world. She believes that the world can get better. She says she knows enough kind and generous people in the world that she has hope for humanity. And so, among the many things I have learned here, one is the value and beauty in hope.